The writings, musings, inspirations, and creations of Corinne Simpson.


Wherein the shit hits the fan.  Also known as ‘Red Carpet Ready’.  Same difference.

The ‘on the spot interrogation’ style of individual competition doesn’t do much except highlight what we already know about the girls.  There are no real upsets.  Zi Lin wins it by being adorably effortless.  Otherwise it doesn’t really illuminate much.

But can we talk about Naomi’s ripped sequined cargo pants and biker hat ensemble in the scenes that follow?  Actually… let’s skip it.  Just typing the sentence feels like enough of an indictment.

In the main challenge, it’s flashbulbs and screaming fans and reporters on a red carpet and… Wendy Williams.  Red alert!  Red alert!  Zi Lin handles all the questions, including the very invasive ones, with poise and a disarming charm.  But when Wendy asks what eyeshadow she’s wearing, she doesn’t know so she appears to make up a name.  Ulta Special Purple.  I kind of admire that bold-faced spontaneous fabrication.  Though as a brand ambassador she should probably memorize the products she’s shilling.  Naomi doesn’t comment.  But when Margaux pauses to consider a question before jumping into an answer, Naomi gives a very pointed look of disapproval.  And when Devyn tells Wendy she doesn’t consider herself a ‘black girl model’ but rather a more international face, Naomi expresses very vocal outrage.  Naomi, make no mistake, is in this to win this and decorum be damned.

It’s a double elimination episode so each of the losing teams goes up against each other and only one from each survives.  Team Karolina wins the challenge so Margaux and Stephanie face off and Zi Lin and Jocelyn face off.  I so disliked seeing Margaux and Stephanie turn on one another, even gently, even facing elimination.  The choice is up to Karolina and Karolina plays it honest and true.  She doesn’t get bogged down in the politics or the game itself.  She just assesses the actual models and their potential.  Truth: I am sad to see Stephanie go.  But she does so with grace and determination for the future.  That girl will be alright.  I am not sad to see Jocelyn go and we’ll leave it at that.

The survivors re-emerge.  Coco, who has been chatting amiably with Devyn and Ebony, rushes to embrace Margaux and then Karolina in turn.  Naomi, who has been strutting and posing, rushes to embrace Zi Lin and then deliver a sort of eulogy to Karolina.  Naomi.  Naomi is a contradiction wrapped in an insult packaged in diva.  Karolina made the “right choice” in bringing back Zi Lin because that choice made Naomi happy.  But Karolina made the “wrong choice” in bringing back Margaux because Margaux is too big a threat to Karolina’s girls.  Zi Lin is just as big a threat to every single girl in the room but the difference between Zi Lin and Margaux and their threat level has nothing to do with rational thought and everything to do with Naomi’s pleasure.  It pleases the Divine One to have her girl returned but it displeases her to see Margaux again.  And then Karolina is permitted to speak to the Great One because she has won challenges but Coco is cut off because she hasn’t won a single challenge.  How in holy hell does that make any difference to anything?  Winning does not validate opinions.  It’s like roulette, really.  I mean two teams have to lose every challenge, that’s just the way of things.  It’s neither here nor there on Coco either having an opinion nor the right to voice it once formed.

And then this, Naomi to Coco: “Check your lipstick before you come and talk to me.”  The sentence that launched a thousand gifs.  Really?  “Check your lipstick before you come and talk to me.”  What more can be said?  When all else fails, insult the lipstick.  Because Coco’s girl is a genuine threat.  Because Coco has a genuine point.  So attack, all cannons a-blazing, and then beat a sassy retreat.  That’s a page from the Naomi handbook.  Up until now I’ve mostly found Naomi diva-licious and quite entertaining but today she just made me want to throw a shoe. 

“Honestly, who throws a shoe?”

1 year ago
  1. gingerdynamite reblogged this from vampirenomad and added:
    I loved Naomi at first, but I just can’t with her anymore. She is full-on cray and nothing she says is rational. I...
  2. vampirenomad posted this